Tips for returning to life after cancer treatment

Take your time and don’t compare yourself to others

Vicki, Youth Support Coordinator: Don’t rush yourself into “normal” life as that might have changed, sometimes your likes and dislikes will have changed or just how you generally look at the world has changed. This might mean the other people around them went on living their life so our young person might feel stuck to the time when they got that life changing diagnosis. 

Lisa, Clinical Nurse Specialist: Take your time to understand how the new you feels in the old you’s life. So much changes for the young person, their families and friends and even in the world while they are being diagnosed and treated. Understanding how they have changed and how their perspective has changed and how that can work as they move forward is so important. 

Anon: Never ever feel pressured that you’re not doing enough, you’ve already gone through so much, do what you can manage. Make small achievable goals, and if you can’t meet them don’t stress yourself out too much. 

Antonia: Don’t beat yourself up if you can’t keep up with your family and friends. I was so excited to be cancer free and able to live my life again that I drove in headfirst and ended up overdoing it. Slow and steady wins the race. It’s all about building up the foundations for a healthy and happy life. Everything needs to be in moderation. Having fun is just as important as rest, just make sure you find a balance that works for you. Don’t compare yourself to others, there isn’t a “one size fits all” when it comes to cancer.

Helen: When you’re looking at social media and hearing the stories of other young people with cancer it’s easy to compare yourself, and you might feel like you are not doing as well, or that because they’ve had a harder time your own journey and how you feel isn’t as important or valid.    Remember that everyone’s journey is different and however you feel is OK. 

Nimra: Everyone’s path to recovery is different, and sometimes processing it will take place much later on in your journey, like it did for me. Just keep going because there is a light at the end of the tunnel, even if you cannot see it now, keep going until you do. And most importantly remember that even if you are only making a little progress, it is still progress. 

If I could go back in time, I would tell myself to go slow, be gentle and to not rush my recovery. Recovery is not linear, and it does not look the same for everyone.  You will have ups and downs but keep going! 

Don’t Bottle Things Up

Helen: After I finished treatment people expected me to be ecstatic, but although I was relieved, I also felt angry and lonely.  I bottled up how I was feeling as I felt embarrassed and guilty about my thoughts, and I didn’t want to upset my mum who was obviously really happy her only child had pulled through.  But you can only hide your feelings so long – and when I finally opened up about how I was feeling I felt so much better – actually physically lighter.

Anon: It’s really important to put yourself first, let your managers, professors, mentors, whoever is their to support you, let them know what you can and can’t do. Ask for a referral to occupational health. You may ‘look’ fine but only you know how you feel and what you’re capable of.

Celebrate small achievements 

Lianne: One thing I’d tell people would be to celebrate your small achievements. It’s big after what you’ve gone through, especially after treatment and milestones are just as important as big things. It’s the small wins that all mount up and gets you back to finding your new self.

Get a routine 

Lianne: Through treatment you have routine and appointments. After treatment that routine stops, so you can feel lost. I think the best thing to do is fine a new routine. Routine helped me a lot, it’s the consistency and having a pattern that gets you through, especially after being used to it for so long in treatment.

I spoke to Amanda, my Teenage Cancer Trust Clinical Nurse Specialist, about feeling lost and she said to start out by setting yourself the bare minimum to do, to ease in. This could be a dog walk or doing something you enjoy and as you feel better you can increase it.

Be kind and take opportunities

Olly: Do things while you can and when you can. This has taught me life is too short and there’s no practice run. There are things you’ll want to do before other things happen in life (responsibilities).

Always take every opportunity that comes along. You’ll never know who you’ll meet on the way. 

Life is all about meeting new people and learning about how they could help you or vice versa. So many opportunities are through who you know, not what you know. Learn to be more bold and confident, talk to people you wouldn’t necessarily speak to. Compliment people in the streets or a café, etc. you never know what is going on in a strangers life, so be the nicest person. You’ll often never know how much of an impact you’ll have on a stranger. The smallest of words, good or bad. So always be nice, people’s lives are often harder than how they look!

These may sound like simple life tips for anyone but I’ve learnt the impact of people’s words while feeling fragile so I now know that anybody could be going through absolutely anything regardless of appearance.

Take it one day at a time

Antonia: It is so easy to get caught up in the what-ifs and worrying about what the future holds. When I first got the all clear and entered remission. I spent most days worrying about my cancer coming back. So much so, that I was missing out and taking for granted a moment that I had wished for and waited for over the past year. Sometimes we forget to be present and forget that where we are currently, is actually where we were working towards being for a long time. Instead, we’re always looking to the future. 

Just remember to be kind to yourself and take each day as it comes. The future is unknown, and for an individual on a cancer journey, that can be a really scary aspect, but it can also be exciting. It is all about trying to alter your mindset. You never know what the future holds, it could be even better than you imagine.