I forgot I had cancer after an induced coma
After waking up from an induced coma and suffering from sepsis, Kirah suffered from delirium, a common side effect of induced comas. The infection followed a diagnosis of acute myeloid leukaemia when she was 21, and six months of chemotherapy.
Sepsis infection
I finished my last round of chemotherapy in December 2022 and Teenage Cancer Trust timed it so that I would finish my chemo and be home in time to enjoy Christmas. I was really excited to spend time with my family and be at home, especially after six months of chemo.
I was just watching Made in Chelsea and eating spaghetti bolognese at home when my heart started beating quickly and I began shaking uncontrollably. I thought that I must be being dramatic and thought I couldn’t be that cold. I then started being sick uncontrollably and my temperature was over 40. My mum called an ambulance, and we went to the clinical assessment unit (CAU).
I was struggling to breathe, could barely lift my arms and was really out of it. They realised my oxygen levels were low and they tried a mask to help my breathing, but I had sepsis, a condition where the body’s response to an infection damages its own tissue and organs, and the infection took control.
I was told that if things didn’t improve then I’d need to be put in an induced coma. I said, ‘No way,’ and they got one of the doctors down from the Teenage Cancer Trust unit to talk to me about it and reassure me. I got worse and couldn’t make any decisions for myself. My mum was really scared, but she knew that putting me in an induced coma was the only course of action.
Induced coma and delirium
I was in the induced coma for three weeks. They were preparing me for a tracheostomy where I’d have a tube to breathe through surgically put into my neck to keep me awake, but then I started to improve, and the physio team gave me a chance to see if I could breathe by myself. It’s important to be awake as the longer you are in a coma the more delirium you have.
Because of the delirium, I thought that I was in hospital because I had drowned. I had forgotten that I had cancer and refused to believe it. I thought that I looked the same way that I did before I had cancer. My family were really concerned. In the end, the hospital staff encouraged me to look in the mirror so that I would believe that I had cancer. I was shocked when I saw myself. I didn’t recognise it as being me.
Teenage Cancer Trust support in delirium recovery
Delirium is a common side effect of having been in a coma and patients can think that the ICU staff are trying to hurt them. I wasn’t really speaking to any of the staff as I didn’t feel safe, so they arranged for Rosie, my clinical nurse specialist, to come down from the Teenage Cancer Trust unit to come and chat to me. Something just clicked and I burst out crying as I felt really safe and comfortable with her, and I started talking again.
I think that things would have been very different without Teenage Cancer Trust, both while I was having treatment and recovering from being in a coma. I had to spend some time on adult day units when I needed to go into hospital with infections and it was so different from being on the Teenage Cancer Trust unit. The visiting times were also stricter, and I didn’t have staff like Rosie or Manni around me who knew me so well.
When I first started my cancer treatment, Rosie was so personable and immediately made me feel comfortable. She had more time than other nurses and really got to know me. She built up a rapport with me, which made me feel so relieved as I knew she would be there to support me through treatment.
Manni, Teenage Cancer Trust’s Youth Support Coordinator at the time, was an amazing support too. Sometimes it’s hard to speak to friends and family about cancer, but I found it really easy to talk to Manni. He’d often come and see me throughout the day but would also come again at the end of the day so that I could get more support.
Support from friends and recovery walk
My friend Cerys provided incredible support to me and my family while I was recovering from the coma, and we decided to walk one mile for each day that I spent in the ICU. We started the walk on 17th of December and after spending Christmas Day with my family, I went and did my walk with friends. On the last day of the walk – 6th January 2004 - my family and friends threw me a surprise party to mark 365 days out of the coma.
I was still dealing with perineal nerve palsy as a result of the coma, so even though a mile a day doesn’t sound like a lot, it was a challenge for me.
I raised money for Addenbrooke’s Hospital as I don’t know what I would have done without the help of the ICU team.